above the wreckage
Apr. 20th, 2005 01:17 pmit's quite disturbing how tenuous one's state of mind can be. one moment u think life's going along spiffily, then the next, u see something, hear something, discover something, and u do that horrible, terrible, inadvisable, yet irresistible thing: u COMPARE.
and 9 times out of 10, the one who falls short in that comparison is urself. wat is it bt human nature that makes one think that the grass is always greener on the other side?
is it genetic? cuz if this is something hardwired into my brain, then that particular bit of grey tissue is obsolete, dysfunctional and vestigial, and like an appendix, i might be better off without it. more likely that it's the society around us that engenders it, messages from the blatant to the most subliminal, seeping into us via osmosis, poisoning our thoughts and beliefs, til we're no longer sure wat it is we want and wat it is society wants us to want.
maybe the most important thing is my own strength of will and sense of purpose. that and the degree of hope and the level of reconciliation with my lot in life. if i can really stand firm, and BELIEVE that what i'm doing is the right thing, that this is the right way, the best manner in my life is to progress, then all other comparisons to it would fade to dust... wouldn't it?
soundtrack: papa roach, 'do or die'; guster, 'great escape'; dishvalla, 'above the wreckage'; live, 'sweet release'; future leaders of the world, 'let me out'
and 9 times out of 10, the one who falls short in that comparison is urself. wat is it bt human nature that makes one think that the grass is always greener on the other side?
is it genetic? cuz if this is something hardwired into my brain, then that particular bit of grey tissue is obsolete, dysfunctional and vestigial, and like an appendix, i might be better off without it. more likely that it's the society around us that engenders it, messages from the blatant to the most subliminal, seeping into us via osmosis, poisoning our thoughts and beliefs, til we're no longer sure wat it is we want and wat it is society wants us to want.
maybe the most important thing is my own strength of will and sense of purpose. that and the degree of hope and the level of reconciliation with my lot in life. if i can really stand firm, and BELIEVE that what i'm doing is the right thing, that this is the right way, the best manner in my life is to progress, then all other comparisons to it would fade to dust... wouldn't it?
soundtrack: papa roach, 'do or die'; guster, 'great escape'; dishvalla, 'above the wreckage'; live, 'sweet release'; future leaders of the world, 'let me out'