wake your mind up
Apr. 11th, 2005 02:30 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
ununoriginalwe had a showdown with one of our flatmates yesterdae. something that has been building up for some time, and there was vaguely simmering resentment all around. and it reflects how difficult it is to find ppl u can really live with. it doesn't matter if u're born into it, even if it's ur own family, tho tat may increase ur tolerance towards it to a certain extent, but there are always jus ppl u can't live with. they can be ur greatest frens in the world, but u may find that the rift in that frenship is gonna begin there -- in sharing the same living space.
it becomes even worse if u already dun like the person in the 1st place, which is the case here. it jus worsens my already poor opinion of americans... tho that isn't really fair, cuz m (the other american gal from iowa) is a lovely person. nah, it's jus her (whom we shall call ABO, for reasons that are too elaborate to get into), and her particular characteristics >_<
and when u step back and look at it, it's over such a petty issue anyway -- cleanliness of the kitchen, how long it takes for us to cook, the time in which we get to cook. plus if she wants to gain the right to preach at everyone else, there better be some indication that she's modelling by example *not impressed*
ppl like her are so egocentric, believing themselves to be speaking on the behalf of everybody, when at the core of it, they're merely imposing their own value judgments on everyone else. so far she's been seen as a needlessly fussy, whiny whinger by the majority of our flatmates. i feel sorrie for m, who has to suffer her opinions.
it was a good thing e (one of my asian flatmates) wasn't here yesterday while she let loose at me and l(other asian flatmate) - there would most likely be a knockdown brawl or something of the like. hopefully it won't deteriorate into something like that. hopefully the open confrontation yesterday is going to serve as a strong hint that jus because we asians are not in the practice of overtly verbalising our opinions/feelings, it means that we're completely indifferent to the way she acts.
when i sit around here with nothing to do and analyse the situation, it seems like a classic example of the cross-cultural management issues that i've jus learned in class. she's specific, we're diffuse - she could merely be targeting the dirty kitchen, but to us, it's like she's insulting our character as well, cuz our actions are so tied up in who we are, it can hardly be a separate thing. she's affective, we're neutral - she kicks up the greatest fuss over every little thing, while we keep a lid on our slowly simmering resentment, cuz we're trying to turn a blind eye and keep the peace.
and here we are, each standing on our own side of the cultural divide, heaving sticks and stones at each other. for all our so-called progressiveness, sometimes we're still remarkably backward.
soundtrack: u2, 'north and south of the river'; july for kings, 'new black car'; nada surf, 'hi-speed soul'; 311, 'wake your mind up'; moffatts, 'misery'; howie day, 'perfect time of day'; fury in the slaughterhouse, 'every generation got its own disease'; junior senior, 'move your feet'; smithereens, á girl like you'
it becomes even worse if u already dun like the person in the 1st place, which is the case here. it jus worsens my already poor opinion of americans... tho that isn't really fair, cuz m (the other american gal from iowa) is a lovely person. nah, it's jus her (whom we shall call ABO, for reasons that are too elaborate to get into), and her particular characteristics >_<
and when u step back and look at it, it's over such a petty issue anyway -- cleanliness of the kitchen, how long it takes for us to cook, the time in which we get to cook. plus if she wants to gain the right to preach at everyone else, there better be some indication that she's modelling by example *not impressed*
ppl like her are so egocentric, believing themselves to be speaking on the behalf of everybody, when at the core of it, they're merely imposing their own value judgments on everyone else. so far she's been seen as a needlessly fussy, whiny whinger by the majority of our flatmates. i feel sorrie for m, who has to suffer her opinions.
it was a good thing e (one of my asian flatmates) wasn't here yesterday while she let loose at me and l(other asian flatmate) - there would most likely be a knockdown brawl or something of the like. hopefully it won't deteriorate into something like that. hopefully the open confrontation yesterday is going to serve as a strong hint that jus because we asians are not in the practice of overtly verbalising our opinions/feelings, it means that we're completely indifferent to the way she acts.
when i sit around here with nothing to do and analyse the situation, it seems like a classic example of the cross-cultural management issues that i've jus learned in class. she's specific, we're diffuse - she could merely be targeting the dirty kitchen, but to us, it's like she's insulting our character as well, cuz our actions are so tied up in who we are, it can hardly be a separate thing. she's affective, we're neutral - she kicks up the greatest fuss over every little thing, while we keep a lid on our slowly simmering resentment, cuz we're trying to turn a blind eye and keep the peace.
and here we are, each standing on our own side of the cultural divide, heaving sticks and stones at each other. for all our so-called progressiveness, sometimes we're still remarkably backward.
soundtrack: u2, 'north and south of the river'; july for kings, 'new black car'; nada surf, 'hi-speed soul'; 311, 'wake your mind up'; moffatts, 'misery'; howie day, 'perfect time of day'; fury in the slaughterhouse, 'every generation got its own disease'; junior senior, 'move your feet'; smithereens, á girl like you'
